ENCW 205: Art & Identity in New Orleans

“What do you love? What do you live by?”

These questions were thrown at Binx by his aunt Emily. Until this moment, I saw someone like Binx who was going against the norm and a preset life for him. He was ambitious, and he was taking his time. He was a rebel and he knew himself. He knew that this life his aunt was expecting of him was not for him. I admire rebelliousness. But I find myself questioning this thought today – If he truly knew himself – what was stopping him from answering these questions? Nothing. Or maybe the uncertainties were just a part of the process.

“..the specific character of despair is precisely this: it is unaware of being despair.” – Soren Kierkegaard

I would say Binx’s complicated character is what makes it interesting. And Kierkegaard gives it a context. Perhaps Binx’s search for an answer was his version of drowning in an ocean of despair. He was in despair because to him, he was just confronting societal norms and was unwilling to accept the limitations of life that were presented to him. It could have been his way of denying that life was just that bland. Perhaps, he was subconsciously aware that what he sought was not something he could achieve. But he was unaware of being in this despair until he was faced with this question of “what do you live by?”

Binx did not know the answer. But perhaps he accepted the unruliness life is, and the cruelty of life’s blandness. Perhaps, he was finally aware of being despair.

The Moviegoer was a book that I personally was able to relate to in an odd way. In class, it was mentioned how everyone hated this book and that it was terrible, so admitting that, somehow, in a way, I was able to sympathize with the piece is a complicated truth that in class I already know will be hard and possibly embarrassing to admit. Now, please do not misunderstand me, I do not relate to everything Binx feels and experiences, but there are a few minor details that I was able to relate to in two distinct ways.

Binx experiences having an unclear purpose for his life throughout the book, which as a 21-year-old college student in her senior year, I can very much understand. One line that struck me and that made me begin to question myself and my purpose was “..Everything is upside down for me..What are generally considered to be the best of times are for me the worst of times, and that worst of times was one of the best.” (10) This line is one of my favorite lines of the entire book. This one line shows the complexity of who Binx is, as well as highlighting an underlying theme of the complexity of life for each individual person. Binx speaks of a search for the purpose of his life that he can quite literally taste: “I dreamed of the war, no, not quite dreamed, but woke with the taste of it in my mouth..” This particular line is extremely sensual and I could not help but think of the war that we call life that everyone goes through. Binx speaks of the everydayness that people and he himself may have sunk into, and I cannot help but then question myself and my purpose and if I myself have also sunk into this everydayness he speaks of. Binx does not find purpose until he finds Kate, and that is only because she so desperately needs him due to her mental illness, and so Binx settles, rather than finding the purpose for his life in his own self. This is something I think we all do everyday, to a certain point, in our own lives. However, then there is the argument that maybe, sometimes, our purpose is or can be somebody else. This aspect and dilemma of purpose is quite complex especially in relation to the character of Binx who has trouble connecting with anyone throughout the novel. This leads me to the next point in Binx Bolling’s story that I was able to relate to.

Binx feels a desire for connection, but in my opinion he desires it so much so that he is completely disconnected from everything and everyone around him. I have had trouble with this as well my entire life. One line that I found to be very deep and that shows his desire was on page 41. Binx is speaking of his friends and he says “..how they deserved to be happy. If only I could make them happy.” Not only does this show his desire, but I also think highlights how instead of forming these connections, Binx finds escape from this feat through movies, his lust for women, and his other various activities. Which is ironic due to the book being called The Moviegoer. He is never able to form deep relationships, but believes he possibly can do this as well as find the purpose for his life through his “search”. Once again I think this is his way of avoiding the problem of him being unable to connect, and is an example of him disconnecting. He revels in the “wonder” of what his search could bring, rather than actually experiencing his search. This, I believe, is another example of the everydayness he speaks of. We all want what we can’t have, and we all see to think the grass is greener on the other side, and in doing this, we miss out on the present and the beauty of what life is right in front of us.

In summary, after reading the book and relating some to Binx Bolling, everything and nothing is wrong with his life. However, in my opinion, the problem is that there is no depth to his life until he meets and finally marries Kate. She is first person he is able to connect with as well as give his life a purpose, which finally gives his story and the book itself, depth and meaning.

My favorite thing about novels is that they are written by novelists.

Most artists, though it is not exclusive to this category of people, in my experience find it incredibly difficult to block out the eternal question of why in their everyday lives. I view this quality as an intrinsic part of the artist’s lifestyle, though I am applying this term broadly. Not only am I referring to those who have followed this call to creative fields, but those who have decided to become intellectuals, teachers, businesspeople, bricklayers, what have you, as long as this quality is there. It is best described by the following (https://existentialcomics.com/comic/174)

Binx attempts to solve this by presenting it as a sort of game for himself in the search. By making it a grand adventure, he staves off the anxiety which accompanies it, presenting himself as one of the heroes in his movies, though he still regards himself as quite ordinary. This is similar to the venture we saw from Edna Pontillier when dealing with similar feelings. However, due to Edna’s gender, she does not have Binx’s freedom to conduct a search in the same way; instead of finding the answers to her questions, she must first find who she is as an individual. By giving their protagonists the same core desire and mission, The Moviegoer and The Awakening show how gender can shape a person’s life in unexpected ways.

First off, I want to say that this book was really hard for me to read.  The beginning of this book sent me spiraling down a rabbit hole in which I questioned my entire existence and purpose as a human. I basically had an existential crisis at every page turn. Binx was talking about this search and that “the search is what anyone would undertake if he were not sunk in the everydayness of his own life” (9), which made me think that I, too, was sunk in the everydayness of life and unaware of my purpose. So I found it extremely difficult to pay attention to what was occurring in the book while I questioned the last 20 years of my life.

As I continued reading, my own “search” was still in the back of my mind; maybe that is why it started to get dry for me. The only thing that was truly able to grab my attention was the section with Kate’s “tight rope” metaphor to her mental illness, which I thought was beautifully written. Other than that, up until the end, I found the story dry. I do not doubt that this novel is quite complex, so I will do my best to describe what I noticed while I read. That being said, due to the existential question that occurs within the reader and begs to be answered throughout, I think that the best things to say about this novel would come after reading it another one or two times. That way I could try to take in the other elements of the novel that I missed the first time through. However, if one purpose of literature is to make one think and question, the book was effective. I think that is a reason as to why it was the winner of the National Book Award.

Binx Bolling is your average everyday man of the late 1950s. He lives “uneventfully in Gentilly, a middle-class suburb of New Orleans” (3). He has a mundane job where he manages “a small office branch of his uncle’s brokerage firm” (3). He is, all and all, a stereotypical white middle-class man “sunk in the everydayness of his own life” (9). That is until he wakes up one morning and decides that he needs to go on “a search.” What he is looking for exactly is unclear to himself but, none the less he continues. At the end of the novel, Binx’s Aunt asks him the questions “What do you love? what do you live by? … What do you think is the purpose of life…?”(198). But to these questions, he gives her no answer. However, being asked these questions makes him realize that the answer to them is what he has been searching for all along.

The search for one’s purpose in life is a question many people struggle with. In fact, it may be one of the biggest philosophical questions in human existence. Because this existential crisis is one that many people go through, lots of people can relate to Binx as a character. If one was not already questioning or searching for their purpose, this book will draw their attention to that question. I think that is why this book was so popular, it is not about the characters, it is about a larger overarching universal idea. The Moviegoer presents a universal struggle that many people can identify with. Watching one navigate the ups and downs that take place in the search for one’s meaning in life can give people hope that they might be able to find one’s own meaning, too.

Binx Bolling has lived an uneventful life up until the plot of The Moviegoer and experiences joy in the mundane (“I am a model tenant and a model citizen and take pleasure in doing all that is expected of me.”) as well as in television and film (“I too once met a girl in Central Park, but it is not much to remember. What I remember is the time John Wayne killed three men with a carbine as he was falling to the dusty street in Stagecoach, and the time the kitten found Orson Welles in the doorway in The Third Man.”). Since returning from the war, Bolling has spent his time “working, making money, going to movies and seeking the company of women.” Bolling’s relationship with death, both before and during the war, has altered his perception of the world (“For some time now the impression has been growing upon me that everyone is dead. It happens when I speak to people. In the middle of a sentence, it will come over me: yes, beyond a doubt this is death.”).

Death is a constant theme throughout The Moviegoer; Bolling’s older brother died of pneumonia and his father was killed. Bolling experienced death himself during the war, though his description of the event seems as though he feels indifferent to the subject (“I was shot through the shoulder – a decent wound, as decent as any ever inflicted on Rory Calhoun or Tony Curtis. […] Decent except that the fragment nicked the apex of my pleura and got me a collapsed lung and a big roaring empyema. No permanent damage, however, except a frightening-looking scar in the hollow of my neck and in certain weather a tender joint.”) His cousin, Kate, has also had an experience with death, an experience that has caused depression and suicidal tendencies. Despite Bolling’s presumed indifference to the topic of death, the shared experience of survival unites them.

“She thinks you’re one of her kind.”

“What kind is that?”

“A proper Bolling. Jules thinks you’re a go-getter. But you don’t fool me.”

“You know.”

“Yes.”

“What kind?”

“You’re like me, but worse. Much worse.”

The biggest difference between Binx Bolling and Edna Pontellier is that, in the end, Binx’s sudden sense of fulfillment comes from his acquiring a partner, whereas in Edna’s case, it is the ultimate imprisonment. However, it isn’t necessarily Binx’s love for Kate, and vice versa, that brings them together:

“Feeling tender toward her, I embrace her and tell her that I love her.

‘Oh no,’ says Kate and takes hold of me coarsely. ‘None of that, bucko.’

‘None of what?’

‘No love, please.’ (pg. 198)

In Edna’s case, she had no real experience of the world. She was married very young and from then on was devoted to being a good wife and mother; it was all she did and all she was, never going anywhere or doing anything particularly special. With Binx, it’s the opposite; he’s been to war, lost comrades, and as a result has become profoundly alienated. Thus far, most of his daily activities revolve around trying to escape his past:

“For years now I have had no friends. I spend my entire time working, making money, going to movies and seeking the company of women.” (pg. 41)

With Kate, he’s ready to settle down, to dedicate himself to a quiet, simple, ordinary life with someone who truly understands him and can help him to build a new life for himself without constantly being trapped in the past or losing himself in aimless pursuits; in the end, it doesn’t matter if love has anything to do with it or not. They are content with one another, and that’s all that matters in the end.

It’s possible that if Edna, too, were to have had the experiences and opportunities that Binx had in his life, she would have found marriage to be preferable as well, a reprieve from her fast-paced prior life. If she had met Robert before marrying Leonce, if she had had time to discover herself before becoming married with children, or if she had ended up marrying Robert, one of the few people she has a true connection with, she could have felt just as contented as Binx in the end.

It’s also worth noting that these stories are set decades apart. If Edna’s own story had taken place in Binx’s time, it’s more likely that she would have been able to find the happiness she wanted, since women at the time were becoming more independent and empowered to make decisions for themselves. If Binx’s story had taken place in the late 1890s, it’s likely that it still would have gone very much the same.

Binx is similar to Edna in one way: the one obligation that he seems to have (apart from his job and his family) is monitoring Kate whenever she begins to go off the rails, parallel to Edna’s obligations to her husband and children, making sure that they are always safe and stable. Unlike Edna, though, he doesn’t view it as a burden; if anything, tending to her helps to connect him even more to the present moment. By marrying Kate, by dedicating the rest of his life to her, he is able to find the authenticity, the purpose, that he’s been searching for all this time.

One other thing I hadn’t thought about before our class discussion is that Binx may also be marrying Kate more for her own benefit than his. For most of his life, since he was fifteen, he has been tasked with caring for her, making sure that she remains mostly stable, and much of their time together in this story, as they travel together over the course of several days, reflects that. Now, with this sudden suicide attempt, on some level, he fears he is failing, that he hasn’t been attentive enough, protective enough. Through marriage, he’ll be able to keep an even closer watch on her, and perhaps her becoming a wife and/or mother could help to stabilize her further, giving her a purpose of her own. It lends even more credence to the idea that there isn’t much (romantic) love between them; now more than ever, I view this as a marriage of convenience. Binx is able to ensure that he will always be able to look after Kate now, truly making it his own task, as well as being able to quit his “search” and settle into an ordinary life; Kate is able to assign herself a role that may or may not improve her situation, giving herself a partner who will always be there to encourage her through dark times and help her when she falls. She is thinking not of love, but of security; she mentions that Binx is the only person she doesn’t feel frightened around. Similar to Edna, marriage has its own meaning for her, but unlike Edna, she sees it as the best possible outcome for herself.