While The Moviegoer was very hard and time-consuming for me to get through, I did find myself relating to Binx. When reading novels with neurodivergent main characters I often find myself trying to diagnose them with personality disorders. This probably comes from my own struggle with my disorder and my need to find things, people, or characters that make me feel normal. While I do not believe Binx and I share the same diagnosis there are many symptoms that I can relate to.
For one, his disdain for the mundane life cycle. The cycle of waking up, eating breakfast, going to work, and coming home is not as stimulating for some as it is for others. While the routine of this can help move a person to recovery and normal life the need for stimulant controls people like Binx and I. We’re always looking for something new, something different that can keep us moving because settling into something we know can cause a bad light to cover everything we look at.
The other thing is his relationships with his secretaries. While I have never had a secretary to have an affair with I do have the deep need to connect with someone on a certain level. Binx starts relationships with these women thinking that he’ll find what he needs and when he doesn’t he lets the relationship sour and end even if he doesn’t notice that it’s him causing it. He says that by the end of the relationship it’s almost a relief to let it fo since both parties can not stand to be around each other. Interpersonal relationships are something a lot of people with a personality disorder struggle with. While I do not like to admit it, I will hop from one relationship (usually platonic) to another in search of something to stimulate me and make me feel whole. If the relationship doesn’t give that to me I’m usually the first to let it go and forget about it immediately.
While I may not have enjoyed the journey of this book, I was rather impressed with the author’s ability to show such a complex character.